Tuesday, August 7, 2012
Hands full indeed!
I hear that saying A LOT when I go out. "Oh you look like you have your hands full..." I usually nod and smile and pretend like it's not a big deal. I can handle a 3 year old and twin 1 1/2 year olds without breaking a sweat. The reality is most of the time I can. It has become something I had no choice but to adapt to and make work. I don't think anybody expects to get twins but when it happens it is amazing and a blessing. Most of the time it isn't a big deal but then there are days when I think WHY?! To be entirely fair the twins really aren't the problem. The majority of my struggle is with my 3 year old. I will be the first to admit I spoiled her. When she was born I held her all day long. You couldn't rip her from my hands. I rarely put her in her crib in fact. Even if she was crying none stop all day long (and trust me she was a cryer!) I wouldn't have the heart to put her in her crib and walk away for a bit. Okay obviously I learned from that with the twins. I learned A LOT from raising Cambree and I do the complete opposite with the twins. The twins have a schedule. They nap at 11 and go to bed at 7. I think the thing about your first child is that it is a learning experience. You go in having no idea what to do and not to mention the fact I was clear across the ocean in England raising my first child. I definitely babied Cambree too much and I am definitely living with the consequences now. Now I need to find a way to give Cambree structure. To enforce her being a big girl. She hates to be alone. HATES it! I will put her upstairs playing with the twins and go downstairs for a minute to myself and she will follow me downstairs in less than 4 minutes flat. She has a lot of weird quirky things she does too. She hates drinking plain water. If I give her a sippy cup with plain water she says it is dirty and won't drink it! "Dirty mommy!" She inspects her food before she eats it. For example if I give her a graham cracker and if one of the corners is broken at all... she won't eat it. "Broken mommy!" She recently stopped eating chocolate chip cookies because she turns them over to inspect them and if she sees chocolate chips on the bottom of the cookie (and obviously there ISN'T a cookie that doesn't have a chocolate chip on the bottom) she straight up refuses to eat it. I mean crazy stuff like that she drives me insane with. Her newest thing is she has to have her food cut up into the smallest of slivers or she won't eat it. "Too big mommy!" I'm talking tinsy little pieces. All these things add up to daily frustrations and someday's I just don't think I can do it. Somedays it hits me that I am in over my head. It makes me feel like I am a completely failure. I try to take some deep breaths. Walk away if I need to and try to come back and be patient. So yeah when people say "you have your hands full"... they are totally right. I do have my hands full! Here is to hoping that when Cambree turns 4 things go a little smoother. A little easier and hopefully she will start to eat chocolate chip cookies again!
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